


Dearest Fareeha,

by LawBringerSSV2



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2019-05-13 04:53:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14742347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LawBringerSSV2/pseuds/LawBringerSSV2
Summary: And, well, knowing you’re going to die suddenly makes dying all the more scary.





	Dearest Fareeha,

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my bud for the good edits.

Angela traced the newly formed mark that rested just below her left breast. It was a simple skull and crossbones that now resided there. A rather plain marking, but it carried all of the meaning in the world. Pulling her shirt back down, Angela began to hunch over the bathroom counter.

She took a deep breath and observed her face in the bathroom mirror. Her eyes looked sunken in and tired, the usual spark of energy and warmth that was almost always present in her sea blue eyes was gone. Her hair was matted and had lost its shine, her skin pale.

Maybe it was the lack of sleep she had gotten these past few days or perhaps it was the undue stress she had been putting on her body. Whatever it was, Angela just looked frail and worn out.

Softly, she closed her eyes and sighed. Her head hurt. She began to search around for her cellphone, blindly slapping her hand against the cool, granite countertop until her hand made contact with the slim shape of the device.

She sluggishly searched through her contacts before landing on the one name she needed. With the quick press of a button, she brought the phone to her ear. It began to ring. Angela sank to the floor as it rang again. She rested her forehead against her knees. Another ring. She prayed to whatever god was out there that the person she wanted was not currently running a mission in some godforsaken country that wasn’t this one. One last ring came through before the ringing was abruptly cut off and a scratchy, accented voice came through.

“Angela,” The voice said in a half-asleep daze, “Angela are you okay?”

Angela smiled gently.

“Hi Fareeha,” She breathed out in relief. “I’m okay, I’ve just missed you.”

There was a soft chuckle on the other end of the line, “I’ve missed you too. Sorry, work has been incredibly busy.”

“Don’t apologize,” Angela told her, “You’re a busy woman. Anyway, I was just calling to see if you would come by today. Spend the day with me?”

“I would love to,” Fareeha responded, “Let me push my meeting back and then I’ll be over in the afternoon.”

A slight panic overtook Angela and surged through her body, forcing her words to come out a bit rushed, “I was actually hoping you’d come over now. As soon as possible, really.”

There was a brief pause before the voice on the other line spoke up again, “Really, Angie, are you okay?”

“I’m perfectly fine,” Angela answered hurriedly before calming herself and speaking with a more natural cadence. “I just… I really miss you, that’s all.”

“Well then, I’ll be over in the next twenty minutes if that’s the case,” Fareeha laughed, “I really miss you too, Angie.”

“Good, I’ll see you then.”

“Of course. See you soon,” Fareeha said before she hung up the phone.

…

A knock at Angela’s door signaled that her visitor had finally arrived. Quickly, she got up from the couch where she had been resting and scurried over to the door. She opened it to reveal the most beautiful Egyptian woman she’d ever had the pleasure of laying her eyes on.

The brunette gave Angela a warm smile before lifting the bag in her hand. “I brought soup and shitty movies.”

Angela beamed, “This is why I date you, Fareeha.”

She then leaned forward and gave her girlfriend a quick peck on the lips before ushering her in.

“Oh, really?” Fareeha questioned as she raised an eyebrow, “So, you only date me for my crappy movie collection and mediocre ability to make soup?”

“Precisely,” Angela giggled, “I mean, that. And you’re cute.”

Fareeha snorted in response and made her way towards her girlfriend’s living room, pulling the blonde along with her as she went. The Egyptian placed her bag down on the coffee table and opened it up to reveal its contents. Inside was a horde of B-movies and two plastic containers of her specialty soup.

“I’ll never understand why you collect such horrible movies,” Angela quipped playfully.

Fareeha crossed her arms and plopped down on the couch, “You just don’t have the cinematic eye that I do. Only those with the finest of eyes for film have the capabilities that are needed to see the genius behind these incredible movies.”

Angela began to bellow with laughter at Fareeha and her antics. “Maybe you’re right, my love. Maybe I just don’t have that so-called cinematic eye.”

The Egyptian woman nodded quickly and pulled Angela onto her lap. She then began to pepper kisses across Angela’s neck.

“I love you, Angie.”

Angela’s laughter died down slowly. She swallowed hard, then pressed her forehead against her girlfriend’s. She stared into the deep, chocolate brown eyes before her and could see nothing but love and adoration. She had stared into those same eyes several times prior, but this time was different. This time was nothing like the others. Angela gulped as knots began to form in her stomach. A sob caught in the back of her throat, but she stopped herself from losing control of her emotions.

“I love you too, my Fareeha. More than you know... And I’ll always love you.”

Fareeha promptly leaned in and gave the blonde a soft kiss. It felt as though it were some sort of an unspoken “I love you and I will forever love you”. She went on to kiss Angela’s forehead before pulling away.

“Now, let’s watch a cinematic masterpiece and eat before our soup gets cold.”

Angela agreed, pushing herself up and browsing the movie collection. After some extensive thinking, she decides on a movie about a cowboy who carries around six-guns at all times and ends up fighting a man who carries around twelve knives.

After putting on the movie, the blonde woman picked up a thick blanket from her hall closet and draped it over Fareeha before grabbing two spoons and their soups. She then allowed her body to collapse on the couch and snuggled into her girlfriend. The two wordlessly watched the movie together, both content.

...

Fareeha gave a small smile as she stared down at Angela. The Swiss woman was fully asleep and had been since about halfway through their second movie. It was only after a bit more admiring that the brown-haired girl decided to bring the blonde into her bedroom so that they could nap together. She shifted Angela so that her girlfriend wouldn’t wake, carefully getting up and lifting the sleeping woman to carry her beyond the hallway. Fareeha pushed open the bedroom door with one of her legs and made her way over to the side of Angela’s bed. She went about gently lowering her lover onto the mattress, trying not to wake her.

She began to lift her shirt over her head when she heard a soft, “You’re gorgeous.”

The Egyptian woman turned around to see a sleepy Angela staring her down, “Thank you Angie. But you’re the gorgeous one.”

Angela shook her head in disagreement and patted the bed as an invitation for Fareeha to come cuddle her. More than happy to oblige, she joined Angela and wrapped her arms around her. She planted a soft kiss on Angela’s cheek before nuzzling her head into the blonde’s back.

The two lay in silence.

 Somewhere along the way, Angela’s gaze shifted to the ceiling. A million thoughts began running through her head. Nearly every single one consisted of Fareeha, who was completely oblivious as to what Angela was going through right beside her.

_She’s so soft and warm. She makes me feel safe and comfortable. She makes me feel like I can be myself. She’s such a big oaf with a heart of gold. Arguably, she likes the worst movies... But l can learn to love bad movies. Look at what she’s done for me today. She’s just so willing to go above and beyond for me if I ask. I love her. She’s beautiful and caring and I don’t want to lose her. I’ll miss this._

I’ll miss this.

Another bout of panic began to set over Angela. Her breathing became increasingly rapid and shallow, her head quickly becoming foggy. She knew she was now having a panic attack, as she had suffered from them frequently ever since her teenage years. The blonde did as she always did and started to try gaining control over her breathing.

Breathing in and then releasing softly. Breathing in and holding, then releasing again.

Angela performed this ritualistic method of breathing until her vision was no longer blurry and her tensed body had relaxed. Only then did she notice that Fareeha’s grip had tightened against hers. She took great comfort in this simple gesture.

Lips pressed softly against her ear, followed by an, “Are you okay, my love?”

Angela nodded, “Sorry... Just thinking about the future.”

“What about it?” Fareeha inquired.

“How I wanted so much from it,” Angela whispered, “You... Kids... To be happy.”

“We can have that, Angie,” She replied confidently, “I will give you all of that and more.”

“I want to marry you,” Angela blurted out.

It was abrupt and without any thought. Her eyes widened at the realization of what she had just said. One of her hands reflexively reached up to cover her mouth. It was too late, though. She had said what she’d said. Fareeha stared at her, no clear emotion on her face. She then got up from the bed and quickly skittered out of the room.

Tears began to form in the corners of Angela’s eyes as she heard the ruffling of the bag from the living room. Was Fareeha just going to leave? Had she scared her off with that confession? Maybe it had all been too much. Maybe Fareeha wasn’t ready for such a thing, despite their discussion about the future and her promises. Angela could only start to feel stupid for admitting her feelings.

But moments later, Fareeha returned. Still clad in her sweats and without a shirt, the Egyptian woman approached Angela. Her hands were tightly clasped around a tiny, black box. Fareeha climbed back onto the bed, the soft groan of the mattress springs giving way to her solid frame. She straddled Angela and gave her a quick kiss before righting herself. She slowly opened the box in her hands and revealed it to her girlfriend. A sheepish look quickly took over her face.

“It’s funny that you mention marriage,” Fareeha started, “Because I bought this for you.”

The tears in Angela’s eyes returned full force as she watched her girlfriend present the ring to her. She covered her mouth with her hand once more and looked up at Fareeha in disbelief.

“When?” Is the only thing she can manage to choke out.

The brown-eyed girl averts her gaze, “Well...”

Angela swiftly took Fareeha’s hand in her own, as if to reassure her.

“...Well. I bought it six months after we started dating.”

Surprise flashed through Angela’s eyes as she exclaimed, “And you waited two years to propose to me?!”

“I didn’t think it would be appropriate to propose six months after I started dating you,” Fareeha squeaked out in defense, “Besides, I thought I was being irrational and moving too quickly again!”

“Okay, then what about after a year had passed?” Angela asked.

“You told me you never wanted to get married...” Fareeha recounted, “So I just shaved the idea.”

Angela rolled her eyes, “I told you that I didn’t want to marry for the sake of marrying. That if I truly loved someone, I would be more than happy to marry them. But that I just didn’t want to get married as a means to complete the next milestone in my life.”

Fareeha looked sheepishly at Angela again, “Well, I didn’t know how to tell if you truly loved me.”

Angela gripped Fareeha’s hands tighter within her own. “You are absolutely unbelievable. I’ve told you that I love you— That I’m in love with you everyday for the past two years.”

Fareeha’s hand found purchase at the back of her neck and she began to rub it nervously. “I thought about proposing so many times, Angie… That’s why I keep it on me whenever I’m with you.”

 Angela was at a total loss for words.

“Every time I decided that I was finally going to, I choked,” The woman confessed with a light hearted chuckle, “But... I love you and I’m ready, now. So, please, let me propose to you.”

Angela swallowed. This wasn’t right. She shouldn’t let this happen. But she wanted it to happen so bad. The blonde loved her girlfriend immensely, more than anything in the world. Didn’t she deserve just one more big shot of happiness?

So she nodded her head.

Fareeha gingerly closed the box again and she took Angela’s hands. She pushes their foreheads together, something she did frequently that Angela adored. She whispered a broken ‘I love you’ before pulling away.

“Angela ‘I-don’t-have-a-middle-name’ Ziegler, I have loved you since I saw you on that military base in Colorado. I have loved you since you gave me a shot to show you how crazy I was about you. I’ve loved you since the first kiss, the first touch, the first time we spent the night with each other… I have always loved you, Angela. And I promise that I always will. I promise to love you unconditionally, until your dying breath. And I promise to love you even after that. You are my life. You’ve been there for me when others haven’t. Without you, I wouldn’t be who I am today. You make me better. You make me carefree.” Fareeha said with a goofy smile on her face.

Angela was nearly on the brink of sobbing.

“So, Angela Ziegler, will you marry me?” Her lover asked.

Angela nodded her head vigorously, the tears taking over almost completely and making it impossible to get out a clear yes. Fareeha beamed with pure, unadulterated happiness before slipping the solid gold band onto her lover’s finger. Angela leaned up and pulled her girlfriend into a passionate kiss, spilling all of her love into the physical exchange. In that moment, her kiss was meant to tell Fareeha everything her words were failing to.

After some time, the pair pulled apart. Both sighed from happiness and Fareeha slipped back to Angela’s side to hold her once more.

Angela happily snuggled into the embrace and whispered, “I love you so much, Fareeha.”

“I love you, too,” Fareeha replied while kissing the blondes cheek. “Now let’s nap, please.”

Angela agreed and closed her eyes. Eventually, her breathing slowed and became shallow. She was out.

...

Fareeha yawned and awoke herself from her slumber. Her mouth was dry and she felt rather cold despite being beneath a blanket and having Angela at her side. She sat up and looked at the clock on Angela’s bedside table. It was already seven in the evening. Apparently, they had slept the day away.

Fareeha grinned widely upon remembering that she and Angela were going to get married. The Egyptian quickly pressed a kiss to her sleeping lover’s forehead, instantly noting that the blonde’s forehead was quite cold.

Puzzled, Fareeha gripped the sheets and pulled them off of Angela’s body. She pushed her hand underneath Angela’s shirt and against her stomach. Even her stomach was cold. It was as if Angela wasn’t producing any body heat of her own.

Fareeha grabbed her girlfriend’s shoulders and shook them softly. “Angela, you’re kind of cold. Get up so we can wrap you in a blanket or two.”

There came no response.

“Angela, baby, I know you’re tired,” Fareeha started with more concern, “But I need you to get up. I’ll make you more soup and we can have you take some more medicine.”

Again, no response.

Fareeha was starting to feel somewhat anxious now, beginning to shake her girlfriend with a little more force.

“Angela,” She says louder.

“Angela,” Again, her volume raises.

Nothing. Nothing at all.

Fareeha quickly brought her finger to the blonde’s pulse point and tried to remain calm. She couldn’t feel anything. Dread then washed through Fareeha’s body as she tried to process the situation.

“No, no, no, no.” She began to chant to herself over and over again.

The Egyptian woman then went about muttering to herself, “Okay, I’m not a doctor, but maybe she’s okay. Maybe I just need to get her to the hospital. They’ll know what to do. Yeah, I’m sure they will. Angela’s fine. She’s fine. Maybe I’m checking for a pulse wrong. She’s okay, she’s fine.”

Fareeha frantically got up and she scooped up the blonde’s unresponsive body. She made a hurried beeline for the apartment door. The entire time, she could only continue to speak to her unconscious lover.

“It’s okay, baby. I’m going to get you to the hospital. You’re going to be okay.”

The soldier grabbed the keys from the counter with Angela cradled in her arms. She rushed out the front door without bothering to close it behind her. There were more important things to worry about. Quickly, she jogged her way down the flights of stairs and over to the parking garage. She unlocked the car and opened the passenger door, softly sliding her girlfriend’s body into the seat. Fareeha then buckled Angela in.

“Just hold on, baby. I’m going to get you there, just please hold on,” Fareeha assured her, despite being in a full blown panic herself.

The brunette rushed over to the driver’s side and started the car up. She put it into reverse and backed up before quickly throwing it into drive and flooring it to the hospital. She took a frenetic glance at Angela’s lifeless form and told herself that she had to stay strong. She had to get her to the hospital. The doctors would make it better. She was sure of it. Then they’d get married and have kids and it would all be okay. It would all be okay.

Fareeha knew it would be okay.

...

The ER nurse watched as a tall, brown-skinned woman rushed into the hospital with a blonde woman in her arms. The conscious woman was shoeless, shirtless, and looked to be completely panicked.

Slowly, she approached the girl. “Hi, can I help you?”

The tall woman spoke out immediately, “Please, she needs to see a doctor quick.”

Fareeha pointed to the woman in her arms, “I woke up and she wasn’t breathing. She needs help, please! I don’t think she has a pulse!”

The ER nurse nodded and rushed off to go grab the doctor and a gurney. Fareeha remained planted in that spot with Angela in her arms.

She continued to whisper into her ear, “Stay strong, Angie, please stay strong. You’re going to get through this. Please get through this.”

Before long the doctor and a couple of nurses rushed out and whisked Angela away from Fareeha. They loaded her onto a gurney and rolled her beyond the ER doors. Fareeha followed as far as she could, but the nurses prevent her from going any further. They claim they have to do their best to give the doctor room to work. Fareeha can do nothing more than break down into a heap of tears, begging the nurses to let her closer to Angela, begging them to save her.

“Please,” Fareeha wailed, “Just bring her back. Please.”

The Egyptian woman fell to her knees as she watched them round the corner and out of sight. She caught one final glimpse of her fiancées lifeless body before a nurse helped her off of the hallway floor and into a waiting room.

...

Fareeha’s head was buried in her hands as she stared at the ground. It had been hours since she’d heard anything and she’d cried all of the tears her body could produce. Her mom was now there to comfort her. She had brought her a shirt and some shoes.

All Fareeha wanted was for Angela to come waltzing through the door, looking happy and healthy. She wanted Angela to just be alive. But a little part of Fareeha knew that Angela was gone. Even though she refused to admit it to herself, Fareeha knew.

There came a soft knock on the door and the doctor entered the room. Ana, Fareeha’s mom stood to greet him, but Fareeha couldn’t even bring herself to look up from the ground.

“So, I have a couple of questions I’d like to ask. If that’s alright,” The doctor spoke, her voice drawing Fareeha’s attention.

Bloodshot brown eyes met the eyes of the doctor who looked equally as exhausted, but Fareeha didn’t say a word.

“Did you know she had the mark?” The doctor asked.

Fareeha looked taken aback. “I’m sorry, what?”

“We found the mark. It was below her left breast. It seems today was her day,” The doctor stated.

Fareeha shook her head, “No, that’s not possible… She would’ve told me if she was marked. She would’ve said something!”

The doctor observed the visibly shaken woman in front of her. “Was she acting any different today? Maybe saying or doing things she normally wouldn’t?”

“I… She...” Fareeha choked as she tried to recollect the last hours they’d spent together, “She was tired today. She asked me to come over and spend time with her. She said she just wanted to relax and spend time together. I just assumed it was because we hadn’t seen each other in awhile.”

The doctor nodded as if telling her to continue.

Fareeha said her final piece, “She never said anything about being marked.”

The doctor hummed, “Well, we tried everything we could to bring her back. But… There wasn’t anything we could do. I’m sorry.”

Fareeha’s eyes flashed with pain, followed by a feeling of intense aching in her chest.

“You know how this works,” The doctor said softly, “The day someone becomes marked, well… It’s their last day. We can bring somebody back if they’re sick, or if they’ve got heart failure, or things of that nature as long as they are not marked. But with a mark, it just means that it’s their time to go.”

“I just refuse to buy into that bullshit, there has to be a reason she died,” Fareeha spat out, “There has to be! People just don’t die!”

“Unfortunately,” The medical professional spoke calmly, “They do. It’s how life works. You get marked, you die. Your time is up and there’s no rhyme or reason to it. No amount of medical expertise can stop it from happening. It just… Happens. I’m so sorry, Ms. Amari. Angela Ziegler is dead.”

There was an eerie silence that filled the room as realization began to come crashing down around Fareeha. Angela really was gone. She was not ever coming back. No more lazy days with her, no more holding her soft hands, no more showering her in affection, and no more pure joy at the sight of her smile.

Fareeha was snapped out of her thoughts as the doctor started up again, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must go. You can use this room for as long as you need it. We will release her body to her most immediate family and you can all go from there. I’m so sorry for your loss.”

Fareeha sank to her knees and began wailing. Ana kneeled down beside her to hold her through the pain. There was nothing more that could be done.

...

Fareeha sat alone in Angela’s bedroom. It had been a couple of weeks since her girlfriend had passed away and now she was cleaning her apartment up and moving her stuff out. She had been moving at a slow pace, as there was no energy in her movements anymore. She was merely going through the motions on auto-pilot.

Getting up, Fareeha went to the nightstand that resided next to Angela’s bed. She was going to clear it out and then sell the nightstand, as she didn’t have room for it in her own apartment. She opened the top drawer and spotted Angela’s rainy day candy stash. A sad smile crept its way across Fareeha’s lips. The blonde always had a major sweet tooth and when she was having bad days, she’d always have sweets stashed away to make it better.

Fareeha pulled out the various candy bars and gummies before discarding them into the trash. Beneath the candies were bills and other various knick knacks that had no place or purpose but were just never tossed. She opened up the bottom drawer and pulled out a stack of letters, all addressed to Angela.

Fareeha smiled as she recognized what they were. They were her letters to Angie from when she was overseas. All silly love letters, or I miss you letters, or just general update letters. Two letters a week, every week, for six months. Fareeha was always consistent with them. She decided she was going to stash those and read over them all later. They would serve as a reminder of how in love she was, how in love she still was with Angela. Fareeha quickly picked the stack up before placing it in a bag. She zipped the bag up and placed it off to the side.

She went to close the drawer when she noticed a stray letter sitting at the bottom of it. Oddly enough, it was addressed to her. Fareeha carefully picked it up and examined it. It was just a simple, folded in half piece of binder paper with her name on it. Quietly and hesitantly, she opened it up to see Angela’s handwriting on the page. So she began to read it.

_Dearest Fareeha,_

_I just want to say I’m sorry and I love you. I woke up this morning to find out I was marked. And, well, knowing you’re going to die suddenly makes dying all the more scary. I know your biggest question is probably why didn’t I tell you. And to be completely honest, I don’t have a good answer for that. It was mostly due to my own selfishness. I didn’t want you to look at me differently or treat me differently during my last day with you._

_I just wanted to do my favorite thing on this planet; Be with you._

_Since I’ve woken up this morning to the mark, I’ve thought about a lot of things. I’ve thought mostly about the things I regret and the things that I will miss._

_I regret not telling you that I loved you sooner. I regret not asking you to marry me. I regret not having kids with you. Most of all, I just regret not being able to be with you every single day._

_If I could turn back time, Fareeha, I’d never leave your side. I’d spend my every waking moment worshiping you, the way you deserve. And I’ll miss you. God, I’ll miss you. I’ll miss your smile and the way your eyes light up when you get excited about something. I’ll miss your warmth, your strength, the comfort that you always give me... I’ll miss your bad movies and your questionable taste in humor, your family, your cooking... Your love._

_I think it’s probably silly to think about what I’ll miss if I’m dead because who even knows if dead people can miss things? I certainly don’t know. Honestly, Fareeha, I’m scared. I’ll never admit it, but I’m terrified. I don’t know what death will bring and I hate the unknown. You know this better than anyone._

_I’m scared of fading away into nothingness. I’m scared of not being remembered. I keep asking myself if I left a big enough mark on the world. Did I love people properly? Did I show people kindness? Will people mourn me? Will they miss me? I don’t know, but a little part of me hopes that the answer is yes. I hope people remember me fondly._

_If none of that, then I just hope that you never forget me._

_I really hope you find this letter. That way you can know how much I love you, Fareeha. Because let me tell you… I love you more than anything on this planet. I love you more than humans love to breathe, I love you more than anybody loves anybody ever, and more than anybody will ever love anybody ever. I have given my heart and my soul to you and they are yours to forever keep._

_You made me whole at a time when I was broken. And you gave me more love than I have ever known. Thank you, Fareeha._

_I love you._

_I love you._

_I love you._

_Take care, Fareeha. Keep living for me. Do not give up. You are my legacy. You’re the one who can make me immortal. So keep me alive in your memories, Fareeha. But don’t let my death ruin your life._

_I love you,_  
_Angela_


End file.
